An Introduction ........... a beginning .............

Hallo out there in internet space,

This is my introduction to my blog, a beginning, which will help me let off steam when living with my husband gets too much for me. It will hopefully give other people an insight, and maybe make them feel less alone, because some days I feel very isolated by his conditions and I don't seem to be able to find a support group to 'fit'.

So who am I and just as importantly who is my husband and why do I describe him as chronically ill.

Me first, since I am writing this - I am an employed mum of two, who will be thirty *cough* something tomorrow. I have been married forever ........ well thirteen years ........... and all of them to the same man. That man I am going to call John in all my posts, because despite it all I do love him (sorry a little soppy) and I have no desire for anyone to identify him and tell him my little frustrations, because he has enough on his plate ......

So on to John...... well he is also in his thirties, he is unemployed, although he says being a full time dad is a job in and of itself ........ and he is ill.

Now you get to see if you agree with me, I have decided to list his problems in chronically-ish order (i.e. longest suffered first)

1. Compressed Vertebrae in his lower back - constant back ache
2. Arthritis - mostly in hands but also in knees (we think) - his hands seize up
3. Late onset Type 1 diabetes (it only took the doctors about 6 years to agree it is type 1 not type 2) - unless you suffer or know someone who does this will be a mystery with a silly comment like he just needs not to eat sugar or something
4. Anxiety / depression - mental health is the pits and in the UK you have to be persistent and patient to get treated ....... I am sorry but drugs and counselling are not the answer for everyone.
   and most recently
5. Autonomic Neuropathy - this was diagnosed less than 3 months ago and my current opinion is I know as much as most doctors do from research on the internet - what really scares me is that if the internet is to be believed my husband will probably be dead in 3 to 7 years - don't believe me - google the topic yourself - 50% die within 3 years (patientline uk) most die with 7 years (I can't remember which website that was but it was high up the google search engine)
6. Postural Hypotension - a symptom of autonomic neuropathy resulting in dizziness and blackouts
7. I think it was diabetic necrosis - (basically massive great sores on his shins, which after a year he finally got treated)

I think that is about it - oh and to top it off he is bad tempered, grumpy and has anger issues. This ignores the fact that family history tends to indicate that he carries the cancer gene as well (on his mum's side 4 out of 5 have / are dead due to terminal cancer, including sadly his mum who died just over a year ago). Sometimes we wonder should we have had kids ........ the poor eyesight comes from me, but from him there is alot of bad genetics.

So from all that you may have guessed that he is never going to be well again, and that is all that chronically ill means - not dying, but not getting better. Chronic conditions change your life, but often people don't realise how much. And the other thing they change is the lives of your entire family.

Right this is about as serious as it gets .......... my sense of humour is fairly dry ................. my husband and I share a very fatalistic humour ............. for example we can see the funny side to the fact that between us we are running out of parents, very careless of us ............... if you can't deal with that I am sorry but it help us cope.

Next time I will start delving a little deeper into John's conditions and how they impact on family life ............ *Wave* ................. bye for now